Man Buckets

A good and gay friend sings and dances to "It's Raining Men" like no other queen I've ever seen. But, in this post I'm not talking about the abundance of the opposite sex, rather how I personally group the interaction between myself and the relationships with them over the years. It's a great system. One that can be optimized for yourself.

In a lot of ways it may even help organize and analyze exactly what the hell it is you've been doing all this time (whether you're single or a couple).

Here's the bucket breakdown (I've clearly excluded the names for private purposes):

• The one's that change you - these tend to be the ones that make the biggest splash in your world; you usually cry and strive for these
  
• The ones that are just for fun - kick off your prim n' proper boots; these are the ones that are for fun and laughter (no tears should be shed on these guys)
  
• The ones that are better in your mind than in reality - where to begin...these can range from Justin Timberlake to the ones that ended up a disappointment
  
• The ones that want you more than you want them - this is self explanatory; no matter how hard you try (or not) they'll always overdo it and want to be with you more than vice versa
  

The kicker with the "man buckets" is being able to honestly put them in their correct bucket. This is where the biggest challenge lies. It's easy to play the tough girl and group the ones that didn't work out into "just for fun" but lets be honest here.

So what do you do once you recap and group?

Get over the "what if's" and maybe he'll come backs - move onto something new and focus on what you want versus the patterns of what you had.

The "just for fun" guys can be a single girls best friend and fast track to instant happiness. But, understand that these guys will never be the kind of guy you want to be in a relationship with. If you can keep these guys in this bucket, you'll save yourself regretted text messages and tears when you find out he's dating someone new.

Whether you strongly agree or not, the idea for the "man buckets" is to wake up and realize what kind of relationship you really want and not the kind of relationship family or friends want for you.

This can also work quite well for guys to recap the kinds of relationships they've had with women.

Think about it. And have fun recapping.
Image pulled from : http://www.mbaintheusa.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/buckets.jpg

Thinking Like a Guy: Survey of the Sexes Part 2

Yesterday's post was the start of this two part series tackling the "he said, she said" factor. What if really there is no difference in the way men and women think about life and relationships? Rather its all based on timing and the way men and women communicate with each other that makes us so crazy to want to believe we're really different.

Maybe that conclusion is the case with long term relationships and how you want someone to "feel" about you. But what about the physical side of life? Aside from the obvious, how are we different when it comes to thinking about dating and physical contact?

This is what my "informants" unveiled to me:

1. A first date should start with "A" and end with "B"
He said: a. talking b. kiss on the cheek and/or hug
She said: a. killer outfit b. one helluva kiss
My Take: Ladies, ladies. Well done. Guys we love gentlemen, don't get us wrong, but if the vibe is there work your magic...be a man and kiss her. If she's not feeling it, and sirs you will get that vibe if she's not (or if you're not) ending with a hug or just a "it was great to meet you".

2. What makes for a great kiss...
He said: Slow and not too much tongue
She said: Slow and steady...and the gusto to learn from your partner
My Take: It's about the person. The moment. Take it from there. Practice never hurts either.

3. Do you believe in sex on the first date...
He said: No, you want us to want something to strive for. However if it happens, then it happens.
She said: No way, we need to give guys a reason to ask us out on a second date and usually if he's calling and you have had sex on the first date most likely calls are coming in after 10pm and we all know what those are called...
My Take: I think these are spot on.

When it came to gifts that you would prefer to receive for holidays, all of my informants said they would prefer something thoughtful and not always extravagant. Sure XBOX360 and Tiffany's are great, but spending time together at dinner or a show/game was preferred.

What was most interesting, and granted I think it really depends on the individual, but when asked to put these in order from most important to least important, they all agreed (both sexes) that it should be:
1. Work/career
2. Family
3. Significant other
4. Friends
5. Cars/shoes

To sum this all up, I suppose there was no earth shattering or light in the path moment on my way to discovering why guys and dolls are so different when it comes to our emotions and the outward expression of what we want. It really seems like we're all striving for the same things and that we each believe in passion and love but can tell the difference between "not getting enough" and lust.

What do you think? Agree with my informants and their perspective of the opposite sex? Drop a comment...you know you want to!

*Image pulled from TeamSugar.com